It's been a while...anyone reading this thing?

Before I say what's really on my mind, I feel as though I should explain how AMAZING MY LIFE HAS BEEN since I last blogged.

How do I sum up almost a year and half of events while having the worst memory ever

What has happened since March 2012?

I went to St. Lucia, by myself, and it was absolutely the most amazing time of of my life and I wish I had stayed a bit longer.  I didn't really want to go by myself but I just had enough.  I had enough of waiting for others to be where I was in life (or expecting myself to be where they are).  I also felt extremely overworked and under-appreciated at work and I felt like if I didn't escape at that very moment I might regret any future actions.   There is nothing like waking up early (and well rested) going for a walk through rain forest like scenery, sipping champagne on the beach with the sun in your face and the ocean waves putting you into a trance.  Complete bliss and I wish I was there right now!

I also, further, reacquainted myself with an old dear friend who is absolutely the greatest and most amazing best friend I could ever have.  I have a few really good people in my life and I love all of you so much...and I am pretty sure you know it.  I show people when I love and care for them...even if some people stab me in the back, rip out my heart and walk all over it (<--bitter much?).

THIS AMAZING WOMAN changed my life...she did.  I found myself having a life again.  Doing things I loved doing when I was younger.  She introduced me to her friends and all I could think was, "oh this is what adults act like?"  I know, that's so rude of me but I found myself surrounded by people who didn't have any ambition, never though about their future, was bound by rules and acted like they were in kindergarten.  Its safe to say that if I have any friends in my life now or is still in my life from the past 8 years then I think VERY HIGHLY of you and have the utmost respect for you.  You either share my zest for life or you are so inspiring that I am constantly drawn to you and must keep you in my life at all times!    Its true, there is always at least one quality in each of my current friends that I am in awe of....

And so the ball started rolling and everything was falling into place.   A whirlwind of events and experiences.  Everything I wanted and so much more.    I feel like the Universe was sending everything I dreamed of and I don't want for it to ever stop.

I went to sports games, endless socializing events, met so many people (most did not remain mind you).  I went to New York City and had a phenomenal time with cousin for her birthday.  There is nothing like New York City to give your confidence a boost. I did NOT want to leave...men, ooh, you can sweet talk me as much as you want baby...I was so happy.  I went to JAMAICA! Finally. THANK YOU THANK YOU.  Still brings tears to my eyes that another dear friend made my dream come true.

And the Universe did not stop there!  I went down to my parents home country, TRINIDAD & TOBAGO and spent some time with my dad and family.

I went down to Florida and met up with my cousin that I haven't seen in forever.  We went to West Palm Beach, South Beach and Miami Bayside and we even went on a cruise to Bahamas ----- seriously, is THIS MY LIFE I AM WRITING ABOUT?

Jeez, Westjet even us in first class cause I traveled so much within a short time.  Who knew...my life is unfolding before my eyes.

Now, my bestie and I are planning our trip at the end of March.  Just the two of us...no stress, no worries, just sun, sun and more sun.  

I am sure other things happened in between...men (mostly bad haha) but if you know me. I am all about experiences and even bad experiences are good experiences in my book.

Forget Drake's YOLO I am all about "Making up for lost time".  Too bad there isn't a catchy abbreviation for that one.

I just cannot believe where the time has gone.

Closing notes: I am so thankful for everyone I hold close in my life.  You all mean so much to me.  You all treat me like a human being with feelings and I respect you for that.  I am so thankful for all of the opportunities I have been given.  I am so thankful that this world has treated my friends right and through good times and bad they have persevered. 

I just want to hold onto these moments for life and I am crying on the inside that these moments never stop. NEVER EVER STOP, PLEASE!  I am having too much fun and I cannot allow for anything to get in my way.

Onto my next post...

Ask and You Shall Receive...erm unless its Freewill

Well its definitely been an interesting March or month rather. Seems like since my birthday my life has become a whirlwind and shit! I am NOT complaining.    So I recently made some very out loud proclamations to the Universe!   I vow not to waste my precious life and I will not let anyone keep me from doing what I want to do but most importantly I will prove to myself that I am capable of being loved by my friends and family and hopefully a really cute guy one day... boy did I need what was to come after my birthday last month.

I meet some amazing people earlier on in the year, reconnected with old friends, and old co-workers and who KNEW what was going to come out of it.

As I am a frequent facebooker, I naturally check-in where ever I am.  How do people know how busy or popular I am if I am not constantly checking into a restaurant, grocery store or the bathroom? LOL

Having said that, looking back on all my check-ins, tagged photos and plethora of text messages I realized that my life became what I have been begging the Universe to let it be... drum roll....

LADIES AND GENTS = I have a friggin life!  Scratch that, I had a life before but now I have a life where I am double booked or I have to actually check my calendar!  Where the hell did that come from.  Wait, do I care? NO, I just want it to never stop!  I am the happiest person I have ever been.

Mind you, I was pretty damn happy with my life last year and even for the past 5 years (I've had some rocky times) but March, WOW, amazing.

So here is my affirmation.  I AM HAPPY!  THANK YOU UNIVERSE, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

So what's this Freewill bullshit about?  HA! Seems like you can't ask the Universe to make people actually love you.  I know the people in my life who truly care about me and love me for exactly who I am and know the people who do not (and I don't frankly care....) unless, unless...

it has to do with a guy.  I know, a guy.  Why are you basing your happiness on a man????? Well frankly, if you knew me, you'd know I absolutely AM NOT.  However, I have come to a point in my life where I need a man, I want him to look at me and see only me and want to be around me.  I don't need to see him or even talk to him daily but knowing that one or two days out of the week I get to hear his voice, stare at his gigantic smile and/or feel his warm touch is all I really need.

I don't think that is too much to ask for.

But as of right now, I am still single and its possibly my fault...I tried to be the male version of a douchebag lmao and succeeded mind you (damn that was hella fun) and while I don't want to get rid of the fun part it would be nice to incorporate some heart-felt feelings (directed towards me).

So this is my first official post and it was thoroughly therapeutic.  Hopefully someone cares about my written word :D

Now its time to patiently await for my friend to come over....its Sushi and Technology night.  I will let you stew over that one.

Goodnight

About me ... in a not so permanent way

Interesting Tidbits:

1. I am allergic to most foods (irony? I love trying new things)
2. I am an artist trapped in a serious career
3. I understand men more than they could ever imagine but it doesn't mean I justify their actions or inactions (women too are a curious being)
4. I can be a guys-guy or a girls-girl.  
5. I believe there should be balance in life but who can argue if happy outweighs sad
6. I am not afraid to shout out how happy I am or if I am sad (neither feeling should be disregarded)
7. I love horror movies...romantic comedies make me sad
8. My biggest fear in life is being alone...I am highly independent
9. I am born again fashionista. I wish I was a diva!  I love makeup, new hairstyles & clothes...I do it for the attention (but not the wrong kind)
10. I love interior design
11. I have been through more than you could ever imagine (but not more than I could imagine)
12. I am honest and straight-forward
13. I have the biggest heart if you would only try hard enough to see it
14. I have unconditional love for the people in my life.  Sometimes you can walk all over me.
15. I am totally generous (but I have been burned)
16. I want more than anything to be loved
17. I keep telling myself I will be loved if only you got to know me...for those who know me; I am not so loved
18. I don't want to toot my own horn but I am pretty smart cookie (not in the nerdy sense).
19. My favourite flowers are Tulips
20. I can be quite the freak
21. Rap music with a lot of swearing turns me on...but what doesn't ; )
22. I think one of the sexiest parts of a man is their jaw and hands...don't get me started on watching them eat their food. ha ha ha 
23. I am more confident with who I am today than I have ever been
24. I can get pretty deep but that's only because I am passionate about myself and my well-being
25. I will always weigh your PROS over your CONS because that is who I am.  You are not defined by your last action